Marisa Miller Takes In Vols-LSU, Beats Bobby Maze In Game of Horse
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Gary Parrish (who incidentally is the best college basketball writer on the internets) has a nice profile about Marisa. That's Gary for you, always going the extra journalistic mile. Here's his take. This comes about because Negadu and Miller's husband both went to Brewster Academy.
Here's a bit from Parrish's article:
Speaking of looking good, did I mention Marisa Miller will be at Thompson-Boling Arena tonight? The former basketball player -- "I used to play in school," she said. "I was a guard." -- can't wait to get there (face unpainted, I hope) to support Negedu while trying to help Tennessee improve to 4-1 in the SEC, if only by serving as a distraction to LSU's Marcus Thornton.
"I think the atmosphere will be exciting," Miller said. "I just hope I don't embarrass Emmanuel by cheering too loudly."
Of course this led to questions from reader B.P. (Even though we're facebook friends, this is not Bruce Pearl.)
1. Over/under, Marisa Miller appearing 6 times on the Jumbotron
If she didn't appear more than six times whoever operates the jumbotron should be fired on the spot. The UT athletic department should request the feed from this game and run it with the jumbotron guy sitting beside them. Mike Hamilton should sit with a bowie knife in his lap. For every time less than six that she doesn't appear on the jumbtron the camera guy should lose a finger. Start with the pinkie.
By the way, I watched this game on DVR so I zoomed through quite a bit of the crowd shots, but I don't believe JP/LF/Raycom managed to get her on camera once. This makes complete sense.
2. If you just happen to be walking down the steps at the same time the Kiss Cam is going and you "accidentally slip" with your lips landing on Marisa Miller, what kind of charges are we talking about? (I know you hate giving free law advice, but....Marisa Miller).
Where do the lips land? I'd personally go with the fall and land on the breasts for cushion defense but I'm not a criminal defense attorney.
With defenses like that, I know you're shocked.
I'm also iffy on criminal law. But the key is intent. In legal terms you have to have the requisite mens rea to accompany the act--actus reus. An email suggesting you might accidentally slip would not help your case.
Now, as for a civil lawsuit, you'd be on the hook. No intent required there. But then you'd get to be party* to a suit featuring Marisa Miller. So it probably works in your favor.
(Note being a party to a lawsuit is not like going to a swimsuit or lingerie party. Just so you know.)
3. Coincidentally this happens to be a HUGE recruiting weekend for UT football, so if you're Lane Kiffin you have to walk the recruits in front of her, right? If this happens and Marisa is decked out in UT gear, how many commitments can we expect on the spot?
You don't walk the recruits in front of her you get she and Layla to make out. Then you make a youtube video with the heading, "This is Tennessee football."
4. What kind of move does Bruce Pearl make?
Bruce needs to do whatever he can to get Marisa signed on as a guard. She played in high school. Plus, and this is crazy, she beat Bobby Maze in a three-point shooting contest Wednesday afternoon. (Note, this is not actually true, but I think it's the kind of thing we should all agree is true. Sort of like how you tell your wife that you aren't thinking about having sex with any of the cheerleaders or dance team members when you watch them perform. It's a necessary lie.)
5. Is she the hottest woman ever?
Does the name Elin Grindemyr mean nothing to you? Nothing?Labels: marisa miller vols lsu negadu tennessee
Posted by Clay Travis at 3:52 PM
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