Kurt Hester's theme song. At least according to a reader.
Our beaver pelt trader of the week goes to Texas governor Rick Perry. Why? He broached the idea of secession a couple of weeks ago. And I meant to put this up last week, but then I forgot. Here's the requisite quote:
Later, answering news reporters' questions, Perry suggested Texans might at some point get so fed up they would want to secede from the union, though he said he sees no reason why Texas should do that.
"There's a lot of different scenarios," Perry said. "We've got a great union. There's absolutely no reason to dissolve it. But if Washington continues to thumb their nose at the American people, you know, who knows what might come out of that. But Texas is a very unique place, and we're a pretty independent lot to boot."
How unbelievable is this? What's even more amazing, I was reading a New Yorker article from this week's issue, and, get this, half of all Texas Republicans want to secede from the country. Half!
Are you kidding me? That's unbelievable.
I'm leaving for Texas in about an hour to visit my sister in Houston. I think I'm going to take a packet of minie balls and some sterilized rags to bite on in case of amputation.
By the way, swine flu?
Try making a decision to fly with your 15 month old son and then trying to explain to his Grandma that we'll be fine. Especially after Joe Biden's Today show appearance.
Ben writes:
Clay, how come Rough Draft isn't an actual book, you could have worked on it longer then, right?
Because the publishing industry is a lot like the NFL or NBA Draft. You have to be able to convince publishers that they're not going to lose their shirt with a book. So far there hasn't ever been a single NFL Draft book that has ever sold well. So to publishers that means there isn't an NFL Draft market.
And in order to get a publisher to take a risk with a book they don't believe there's a market for, you have to be a writer of Michael Lewis's ilk, that is you have to have made them a ton of money in the past. Originally publishers didn't want to release Moneyball because they doubted people would read it.
Chris writes:
D'ude, you're killin' it with Rough Draft. Great job!
This is certainly not meant as a back-handed compliment, but your writing has improved a lot since DDT.
Keep 'em coming!
Much appreciated. The goal with writing, as with anything else, is to get better every day. As UT quarterback Jonathan Crompton told me, "If you ain't getting better, you're getting worse. I really believe that."
Monkey see, monkey do.
Matthew H. writes:
Great stories on the draft prep... Every time I hear about Kurt Hester I think of Amos Moses. Also, my dad is a West Point grad from the class of 1966. I am really enjoying the Campbell story. It underscores what my dad wet through and how different his undergrad experience was from any of ours. The story about the demerits and marching was great. My dad got more then his share back in the day and he use to talk about his marching. He was a 28 year Army vet and was a Ranger, Chopper Pilot, Engineer (went to grad school at Stanford), then a doctor (yes, all in the army...).
Still burns me Campbell didn't get a chance with the Lions, but Duty, Honor, Country.
Looking forward to new book.
I agree, Caleb deserved a shot. He really did. But I've written a ton about this already. The Army screwed up big time.
Now you know why a strange video opened up the mailbag this week.
Andrew Mack writes:
Hey Clay, Just wanted to send along a firm "atta-boy" for your 'Rough Draft' pieces for FanHouse, and extend my gratitude for contributing to my affinity for those perilous moments when I walk to school (UVM Post-Bac Pre-Med- HooRa) completely oblivious to my surroundings as a result of my attention being transfixed to your writings on a 4" blackberry screen. I hope you know your talents as a writer will be most culpable when they are scraping the remnants of my spleen from the grill of a Ford F-150, as will be evidenced by one of your articles being on the screen of the blackberry they find a block and a half from the scene of the accident.
I'm terrifed of dying while reading my BlackBerry. This has to have happened, right?
By the way, on Monday FanHouse is announcing a new slate of writers they've added. And I'm not saying this to build up artificial hyperbole, but I think FanHouse is going to have as good of a collection of writers, myself excluded, as exists anywhere on the internet. Seriously, we're talking some real heavyweights coming on board.
My intro column will be up and running come Monday and then the ClayNation column will be off and running again.
But right now, I have to get packed for Houston. So I'm checking out early today.
Steeplechase next week in Nashville, send along your shots and we'll have a Steeplechase shot of the day. I can't wait.
Travis has become enamored of several objects, phrases or events which he frequenly references in the column. Among the most frequent:
'Bama Bangs - a term coined by Travis to refer to southern men's hairstyles that feature prominent bangs for no apparent reason. Brodie Croyle and John Parker Wilson are oft-cited violators of 'Bama Bangs rules.
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When Clay Travis, acclaimed author of Dixieland Delight, decided to spend the 2008 season up close and personal with UT football, he—and every other college football aficionado—thought he was in for a rollicking ride with one of the leading contenders for the national title. After all, when the Vols kicked off the season on September 1, the defending SEC East champions were ranked 18th in the country. As head coach Phillip Fulmer prepared for the game, he reflected upon a coaching career that included an astounding 147 victories, two SEC championships, and a national title. With 34 years at UT under his belt as both a player and coach, the Tennessee native had just signed a contract extension that projected to keep him at the university long enough to become the winningest coach in program history.
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There is no college ball more passionate and competitive than football in the Southeastern Conference, where seven of the twelve schools boast stadiums bigger than any in the NFL and 6.5 million fans hit the road every year to hoot and holler their teams to victory.
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The newly favored man is not really a man at all, but a hairless, effeminate, germ-fearing, non-meat-eating, exfoliating, wristband-wearing woman of the worst order. We as men are told that we must embrace the sacred feminine in ourselves, even if it doesn't actually exist, and become the very quintessence of woman, plus penises. This situation is untenable. This trend must stop.
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Clay Travis is the only former student manager in the history of college athletics to marry an NFL cheerleader. He managed to pull this off despite an irrational affinity for the television shows Dawson's Creek and My Super Sweet 16. While being raised in Nashville, Tenn., Travis developed a healthy obsession with college sports and Alyssa Milano. As a teenager his greatest accomplishment was taking a doo-rag wearing Luke Duke (balling as Tom Wopat) to the hole at the Nashville YMCA.
In the midst of a stellar legal career during which he specialized in rewarding the unjust and punishing the oppressed, Travis began writing for CBS Sports's SPiN section in September 2005...
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