Tommy Tuberville Out: Auburn Fans Insane
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Tennessee's bold move to replace a coach who was 100 games over .500 with a coach who is ten games under .500 pales in comparison to Auburn sending Tuberville to the showers. He's been at Auburn since 1999--running up a record of 85-40. For ten years, Tuberville finished 1st or 2nd in the SEC West 7 times. The years he didn't? This year, his first year, and 2003 when he came in 3rd. Included in this mark was a 13-0 season in, wait for it, 2004. Yep, in the space of a month the past two coaches to run through the SEC like a knife in hot butter--without a single loss--have been axed. Meanwhile, prior to this year, Tuberville had beaten Alabama six times in a row. Raise your hand if you think Auburn's going to find a coach to do this again in your lifetime. Yeah, thought so.
Tuberville accomplished all of this despite using Bryl-creem on his hair, wearing his pants up to just below his nipples, and having ears that appeared capable of flight at any moment.
Now becomes the parlor game of who will Auburn hire? I'm terrified it will be Mike Leach. In fact, if I were a gambling man, I'd put all the money in the center of the table and let it ride on Mike Leach. Or I'd advise Bobby Lowder and crew to do what I advised Mike Hamilton to do, pull up a dump truck in Lubbuck and keep pouring out cash until Leach says yes.
Thinking about this it makes complete sense. Auburn and Tuberville went for the shock and awe approach in hiring Tommy Franklin to try and drive off the wild animal magnetism of Nick Saban (his ugly wife notwithstanding). That failed. Meaning Auburn still needs to make a splash to make up for their fan base being upset over Saban's rise and to try and entice recruits to come down to middle-of-nowhere Alabama (and for the record I really like Auburn's campus). Meaning...
It's going to be Leach.
I just know it. Fuck me. I'm going to be crying with every other Volunteer fan when Leach comes into Neyland and hangs 50 on us next year. The only thing worse than not getting the guy you want for your head coaching job is when a rival gets him and you have to still see him all the time. This is just like season 3 of Dawson's Creek when Dawson and Pacey were dueling for Joey. Only instead of competing for Joey, Tennessee inexplicably turned away and started dating Joey's infant brother instead. Nice move. Labels: auburn tommy tuberville fired mike leach dawson's creek
Posted by Clay Travis at 9:03 AM
 
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Keep the faith, C'lay. If there's one person I'd entrust with the task of slowing down Leach's offense, it's Lane's old man. If you need inspiration, go back to some clips of the Atlanta run game when Vick was at his peak and the Falcons were rushing for something like 300 yards a game. Then watch that offense against Monte's TB defense. Remember the TB vs. Oakland Super Bowl with the high flying Raider offense? Yep. Keep the faith, friend.