Meet Your ClayNation Apostrophe Ranking (CAR) Judges Part Two
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
 As you've no doubt noted, I'm out and about today. At, of all places, a CLE. Once you leave a law firm CLE's cease to be excuses for your firm to pay you not to work and become tremendous wastes of time. God, they're horrible. I'm actually on the verge of starting a company that would specialize in putting on entertaining CLE's. You'd think such a lucrative market would actually lead to fairly entertaining presentations. You'd be wrong. It's honestly amazing how bad most of these are. They aren't even as entertaining as law school classes.
By the way, the above picture is from me dropping the puck at the UT Alumni Hockey Game in Knoxville. I figured it tied in well with yesterday's Mississippi State ice hockey fight.
Anyway, here are three more CAR voters being introduced. Enjoy.
Ward writes:
I would like to throw my name in the hat for apostrophe voting privileges. As for my case I present the following: (1) I introduced Ja’Larry Byrd to the world. (2) I am a long time reader on the net and the book. (3) I am a fellow attorney and any research on this subject would present excellent billing opportunities. Hell this email is a .2 “Draft correspondence to opposing counsel concerning status of case”. (4) I am an Alabama fan and if not awarded voting privileges, would therefore be forced to sick Nick Saban and the Process on you. (5) I am however originally from Chattanooga, a town in which you have family in, so that has to count for something. This also means I am well versed in the knowledge of Tennessee football. (6) I am a tax attorney, so please give me something to look forward to on a daily basis. (8) I actually was able to get my wife to become a fan of the site, simply by showing her your thoughts on Fox and his 1st Halloween costume. (7) I will petition LexisNexis to begin a directory, much like Martindale Hubble, of people with apostrophe names. I anxiously await your response.
Odds that the CAR voter resumes are more impressive than the Harris Poll voter resumes? 100%. Honestly. It's altogether possible that the CAR is going to have a higher average IQ than either the Senate or the House of Representatives. I'm not sure what this means, but it makes me giddy with anticipation.
Charles writes:
Clay,
Not only am I the owner of the first ClayNation hand signal (as indicated in my signed copy of your book), I am a forward thinker.
My discussion at lunch today delved into a new proposed marriage between names and punctuation markings.
Most notably, I pioneered "&drew." Different from the traditional "Andrew," and intriguing. It could be read as "Andrew" and "Ampersandrew" alike, equally interesting. This deserves recognition.
I'm so blown away by the brilliance of &drew that I want to have another son and convince my mother-in-law this is our plan for his name. And that the reason we've chosen this name is to acknowledge how important the word "and" has been to me as the opening to sentences. It's altogether possible &drew is the most brilliant proposed or actual name I've seen in months. (And that includes Le-a....okay, maybe not.)
By the way can you imagine being &drew and studying abroad in China? Would you ever be able to get your name typed. What about on the Blackberry? You could never sign your emails and no one would ever be able to reference you in an email. There could be a whole movie about this.
Sayward writes:
Please find attached a PDF copy of the honor roll list in my most recent newspaper (the Bolivar Commercial). I scanned it because; well you can read the names. I realize that none of the names contain apostrophes, but, trust me this is a rarity. I only wish I could wait for the Christmas edition. The point is that these are the types of names I read on a regular basis and usually there are apostrophes galore. I am hoping that this and the fact that I am a girl who reads the bog pretty regularly will qualify me to be a judge in the apostrophe rankings. I am also a lawyer, don’t know if that is a plus or not. My particular favorite on the attached list is Untariyounsha Davis. I mean really some of these kids are going to be twenty and unable to spell their names. I have also, previously, written in to correct your grammar.
The Bolivar honor roll list, sadly, did not upload using the blogger software. I can't tell you how crushing this is. But, rest assured, that your diligence in scanning a local newspaper is just the kind of contribution we're looking for. Ja'Larryspeed, Sayward, Ja'Larryspeed.
By the way, our Yahoo College Bowl Pick'em is approaching 100 members. Or at least I'm assuming it is since last night that was the case. The first games have to be picked by December 20th. Sign up here. Labels: claynation apostrophe rankings part two
Posted by Clay Travis at 12:32 PM

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