Bag of Mail

Bruce Pearl Loves Chik-fil-A...Girls in Bikinis



I'm adding a 7th prong to the Clay Travis Criterion for the next UT football coach: he has to be willing to gush about fast food at his post-game press conference and when he does so we have to know he's being completely honest and real with us. Like Bruce Pearl did after the UT-Martin game.

"Chick-fil-A has an awesome chicken sandwich," UT Coach Bruce Pearl said. "I never had it until I got to Tennessee. Oh my gosh, I could eat there two or three times a week."

How is Bruce Pearl not the spokesperson for the company? Aside from the small Jewish vs. Christian conflict, he's perfect. Hey, they both love the Old Testament. That counts for something.

True story, I spent one week of law school scheming to see whether the Burger King that was going out of business on 21st Avenue could be replaced by a Chik-fil-A franchise. I did all the research, printed off the franchise applications. I was really serious. Even though my net worth was $-50,000 at the time. I was going to be the first lawyer to be a chicken sandwich baron. (This was before Talbott Ottinger became a chicken finger lawyer-baron in Nashville with Otter's so it was a truly original idea). Then I realized three things: 1. chik-fil-a wouldn't give me a franchise because I didn't have the financial backing 2. you have to work there yourself for a few years 3. I'd have to explain to my parents that I'd gone to law school to become Nashville's chicken sandwich baron.

So instead I went to law school to make dick jokes for a living. Which they're much more proud of. This way everybody wins.

Unless, of course, you want to go to a chick-fil-A and have someone tell you a dick joke when you order a chicken sandwich. Because that business plan is still open, my friends, still open.

Clay's Dick Joke Chicken Sandwich Shack--coming soon?

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Posted by Clay Travis at 12:01 PM

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